George Carlin

George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlinwas an American stand-up comedian, actor, social critic and author. Carlin was noted for his black comedy and his thoughts on politics, the English language, psychology, religion, and various taboo subjects. Carlin and his "Seven dirty words" comedy routine were central to the 1978 U.S. Supreme Court case F.C.C. v. Pacifica Foundation, in which a 5–4 decision affirmed the government's power to regulate indecent material on the public airwaves...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionComedian
Date of Birth12 May 1937
CityNew York City, NY
CountryUnited States of America
And off we go, out onto the highway looking for a little fun. Perhaps a flatbed truck loaded with human cadavers will explode in front of a Star Trek reunion. One can only dream and hope.
I love individuals. I think people are terrific as I meet and get to know them. I like imagination. I like the freedom that this society manages to parcel out to us in the midst of the rest of what they do to you. I also like thinking about the fact that the atoms in me are the same atoms that are in all the rest of the universe, and that every one of those atoms came from the middle of a star. In other words, it's only me out there.
As much as I love my family, I enjoy it when the house is empty, because then I know I'm truly alone, as we all are on the planet, after all. Every atom in us is originally from a star. And during my moments of aloneness, I'm most mindful of that; that I'm just another group of matter randomly but wonderfully arranged. That's when I feel my immortality.
I've never had a 10, but one night I had five twos
The word bipartisan means some larger-than-usual deception is being carried out
Baseball is the only major sport that appears backward in a mirror
Cop didn't see it, I didn't do it!
Marry an orphan: you'll never have to spend boring holidays with the in-laws (at most an occasional visit to the cemetery)
Little-known fact: When the stock exchange closes, the guy who comes out on the balcony with that big hammer slams it on the head of the person who lost the most money that day
Have you ever noticed? Anybody going slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac
If a movie is described as a romantic comedy you can usually find me next door playing pinball
I enjoy watching reruns of Saturday Night Live and counting all the dead people
Rich White Men Don't Care About Poor Black People
One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people