Garrison Keillor
Garrison Keillor
Gary Edward "Garrison" Keilloris an American author, storyteller, humorist, radio actor, voice actor, and radio personality. He is known as creator of the Minnesota Public Radio show A Prairie Home Companion, which he hosted from 1974 to 2016. Keillor created the fictional Minnesota town Lake Wobegon, the setting of many of his books, including Lake Wobegon Days and Leaving Home: A Collection of Lake Wobegon Stories. Other creations include Guy Noir, a detective voiced by Keillor who appeared in A...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionRadio Host
Date of Birth7 August 1942
CityAnoka, MN
CountryUnited States of America
May his soul be forever tormented by fire - And his bones be dug up by dogs - And dragged through the streets of Minneapolis
The audience is invisible and that's good. Somewhere my voice is drifting through a swine barn and the sound of it seems to perk up the sows' appetite. Or a lady is listening on headphones as she jogs along a beach, running to my cadence. Or a dog sits in front of the radio, head cocked, and the sibilants excite him in some mysterious way. A dog's humorist, that's me.
You're such a big liar you gotta get your neighbor to call your dog.
Dogs don't lie and why should I? Strangers come they growl and bark, they know their loved ones in the dark, Now let me, by night or day, Be just as full of truth as they.
When writing loses touch with the beautiful surface of the world, it loses its way. You always want to be in touch with how things look and what people say and what they call their dogs.
When the country goes temporarily to the dogs, cats must learn to be circumspect, walk on fences, sleep in trees, and have faith that all this woofing is not the last word.
Powdermilk biscuits: Heavens, they're tasty and expeditious! They're made from whole wheat, to give shy persons the strength to get up and do what needs to be done
Mark Twain told jokes, but they somehow stayed funny for a hundred years; they're still funny today. When Mark Twain said, 'He was a good man in the worst sense of the word,' we know exactly what he's talking about. When he said 'Wagner's music is not as bad as it sounds,' it still is funny. Mark Twain was really a miracle.
Secret of life is to go through something harrowing that doesn't kill you...and to love one woman for the rest of your life.
one of the amazing experiences of my young life.
It's been a quiet week in Lake Wobegon, my home town, out here on the edge of the prairie
Where all the women are strong, all the men are good-looking and all the children are above-average.
an excellent age for reform of all sorts.
I'm not busy, ... A woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't think my schedule looked so busy.