Fran Lebowitz
Fran Lebowitz
Frances Ann "Fran" Lebowitzis an American author and public speaker. Lebowitz is known for her sardonic social commentary on American life as filtered through her New York City sensibilities. Some reviewers have called her a modern-day Dorothy Parker...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionEssayist
Date of Birth27 October 1950
CityMorristown, NJ
CountryUnited States of America
allow children mix
Do not allow children to mix drinks. It is unseemly and they use too much vermouth.
apartment order outdoors pass
. . .to me the outdoors is what you have to pass through in order to get from your apartment into a taxicab.
chance figure whether
I figure you have the same chance of winning the lottery whether you play or not.
hear last life phone stage teenager
Remember that as a teenager you are in the last stage of your life when you will be happy to hear the phone is for you.
assure conscious firm life refusal remain
Stand firm in your refusal to remain conscious during algebra. In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.
book cause high school unpopular
Having been unpopular in high school is not a just cause for book publication
cement children color discussing interest mixer persist recently subtle topic
Notoriously insensitive to subtle shifts in moods, children will persist in discussing the color of a recently sighted cement mixer long after one's interest in the topic has waned
book parties worse
I often used to say, the more parties there were for a book, the worse the book was.
racism racist environment
Whenever someone accuses someone of being a racist - which is rare, you have to admit, considering how much racism there is - there is an incredible outrage. I realized that we live in an environment that it seems to be worse to call someone a racist than to be one.
writing thinking opposites
Most writers write too much. I have the exact opposite problem. I feel I could write almost anything in a paragraph. I have a natural ability to condense, and so I often think, "Are you kidding me? Five thousand words? How am I gonna make 5,000 words out of that?"
mean past people
I used to rent a house in Princeton, New Jersey, and whenever people came to visit me, I would drive them past Albert Einstein's house, which is the most ordinary house in Princeton - a house, let me assure you, that now a salesman wouldn't live in. I'd always say, "That was Albert Einstein's house." And they'd say, "What do you mean? Why would Albert Einstein live in a little house like that?" And I'd always say to people, "Because he didn't care!"
art cheer made
Perhaps the least cheering statement ever made on the subject of art is that life imitates it.
people looks communist
Communists all seem to wear small caps, a look I consider better suited to tubes of toothpaste than to people.
believe mean people
I'm not a Communist. I'm an American. I'm a capitalist. I mean, I'm not a very good capitalist, myself. I'm not very good at it, but it's not that I'm not for capitalism. But people who believe in things like corporate citizenship, it's idiotic. I mean, it shows you're an idiot.