Erma Bombeck
Erma Bombeck
Erma Louise Bombeckwas an American humorist who achieved great popularity for her newspaper column that described suburban home life from the mid-1960s until the late 1990s. Bombeck also published 15 books, most of which became bestsellers. From 1965 to 1996, Erma Bombeck wrote over 4,000 newspaper columns, using broad and sometimes eloquent humor, chronicling the ordinary life of a midwestern suburban housewife. By the 1970s, her columns were read twice-weekly by 30 million readers of the 900 newspapers in the U.S...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionJournalist
Date of Birth21 February 1927
CityBellbrook, OH
CountryUnited States of America
With all the precautions and risks that accompany sex today, it sounds about as much fun as walking through a minefield.
One son appears in stereo - a transistor in one ear and the phone in the other..
Humorists can never start to take themselves seriously. It's literary suicide.
Last year I gave seventy-four phone hours to soliciting baked goods for the Bake-A-Rama. I was named Top Call Girl by the League.
Phone are wonderful instruments, but I wouldn't want our daughter to marry one.
Sex in the nineties is boring. The problem is that it has gone from an active act to a spectator sport. We watch people make love on television and in films. We call 900 numbers to hear what someone would do to us if they weren't sitting in a boiler room of other dirty talkers reading from a prepared script.
A member of the committee slapped a name tag over my left bosom. "What shall we name the other one?" I smiled. She was not amused.
Remember, you can lead a fifty-seven-year-old body to motherhood, but you can't make it stay awake.
Crocodiles have a smile I've seen on the face of every lawyer I've ever met.
I convinced him his luggage had gone to that big Bermuda Triangle in the sky.
The fact that Americans drag around the world by the busloads to glimpse the past probably has something to do with the youth of our country. We revere anything older than George Burns.
We even switched to a newly-formed church across the town that gave one hundred and twenty trading stamps each time we attended. (We now worship a brown and white chicken with a sunburst on its chest.)
People usually survive their illnesses, but the paper work eventually does them in. Filing a claim for insurance is terminal.
The mole rat is the only rodent born without a fur coat. With a good lawyer, someone would pay for that little oversight.