Denis Leary
Denis Leary
Denis Colin Learyis an American actor, a writer, a producer, a singer, and a comedian...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionTV Actor
Date of Birth18 August 1957
CityWorcester, MA
CountryUnited States of America
jobs mean kids
I think daycare is great for people who have to work two jobs. My problem is with people who are dropping kids off at daycare because they want to go out and spend the day golfing or getting their nails done. You know what I mean? That's not why they invented daycare.
jobs new-york fire
Most of the women placed in the fire department here in New York never passed the physical test. And a fat guy or a short guy, or anybody not passing the test in a life-or-death job, leads to friction.
jobs school acting
I studied acting in school and then, of course, couldn't get an acting job.
mother jobs dad
There is a huge boom in autism right now because inattentive mothers and competitive dads want an explanation for why their dumb-ass kids can't compete academically, so they throw money into the happy laps of shrinks . . . to get back diagnoses that help explain away the deficiencies of their junior morons. I don't give a [bleep] what these crackerjack whack jobs tell you - yer kid is NOT autistic. He's just stupid. Or lazy. Or both.
funny jobs humor
I have good kids, I love my kids. I try to bring them up the right way, not spanking them. I find that I don't have to spank them. I find that waving the gun around pretty much gets the same job done!
jobs writing two
I was working with Peter Tolan, who was my writing partner on those two [Rescue Me and The Job], and he did The Larry Sanders Show with Garry Shandling, and he always said that the second season is better because you know the actors.
sex jobs rocks
I've only done two other TV shows [instead of Sex&Drugs&Rock&Roll], one was Rescue Me and the other was a show called The Job, which was at ABC and only on for two seasons.
diego emotional fear funny gets john leader ray smart thinks
Ray Romano gets the films' emotional moments, John the funny ones, but Diego makes it all happen. Diego is still a leader smart and strong, but he thinks he may be getting soft' because of his fear of the water.
blow five gonna last people shows
I will tell you that the last five shows are going to really blow people out of the water. There's gonna be a lot of head-spinning going on.
christmas high kite merry teeth
I'm high as a kite and my teeth are green, Merry f**kin' Christmas!
best humorous jim
Personally, I think Jim Henson said it best when he said "Anybody got an aspiren? I think I've got a cold.
both fire funny last stories true
Most of the stories that we do are true stories from the last 20 years in the fire department, both funny and tragic,
along bang beg bills bus cancer city curb death dog dollars goes hard hit leaves left life limp massive medical million mouth owe pay people power regain side speak step streets talk ten walk wife work
Most people think life sucks, and then you die. Not me. I beg to differ. I think life sucks, then you get cancer, then your dog dies, your wife leaves you, the cancer goes into remission, you get a new dog, you get remarried, you owe ten million dollars in medical bills but you work hard for thirty-five years and you pay it back and then -- one day -- you have a massive stroke, your whole right side is paralyzed, you have to limp along the streets and speak out of the left side of your mouth and drool but you go into rehabilitation and regain the power to walk and the power to talk and then -- one day -- you step off a curb at Sixty-seventh Street, and BANG you get hit by a city bus and then you die. Maybe.
agree balloon everybody funny mean popping whether
I write what I think is funny and I write from a sense of popping a balloon or a sense of injustice, whether it's about yourself, or whether it's about something else. It's my worldview; it doesn't mean that everybody has to agree with it.