Dave Barry
Dave Barry
David McAlister "Dave" Barryis a Pulitzer Prize winning American author and columnist, who wrote a nationally syndicated humor column for the Miami Herald from 1983 to 2005. He has also written numerous books of humor and parody, as well as comedic novels...
NationalityAmerican
ProfessionJournalist
Date of Birth3 July 1947
CityArmonk, NY
CountryUnited States of America
journalism newspapers columnists
As the saying goes: "If you're not part of the solution, you're a newspaper columnist."
tv-news personality stories
I would not know how I am supposed to feel about many stories if not for the fact that the TV news personalities make sad faces for sad stories and happy faces for happy stories.
giving news evening
You know how on the evening news they always tell you that the stock market is up in active trading, or off in moderate trading, or trading in mixed activity, or whatever. Well, who gives a
mean wish newspapers
On behalf of the newspaper industry I wish to announce some changes we're making to serve you better. When I say 'serve you better,'' I mean 'increase our profits.' We newspapers are very big on profits these days. We're a business, just like any other business, except that we employ English majors.
dog rottweilers news
The bad news was that the yard contained a dog. A very, very large dog, wide and hairy, like a cross between a rottweiler and a Goodyear blimp.
jobs mean tv-news
I do not mean to be the slightest bit critical of TV newspeople, who do a superb job, considering that they operate under severe time constraints and have the intellectual depth of hamsters. But TV news can only present the "bare bones" of a story; it takes a newspaper, with its capability to present vast amounts of information, to render the story truly boring.
jobs real news
For the benefit of those of you who have real jobs and are not involved in the news business, I should first explain that . . .
attach best columns figured hope major motion newspaper nobody people pictures seriously shaped tom
I figured out why I'm not getting seriously rich. I write newspaper columns. Nobody ever makes newspaper columns into Major Motion Pictures starring Tom Cruise. The best you can hope for, with a newspaper column, is that people will like it enough to attach it to their refrigerators with magnets shaped like fruit.
computer mean word
USER, n.: The word computer professionals use when they mean 'idiot.'
domestic life people walks work
You get people from all walks of life here -- who work in domestic service.
both dark fairly socks
Both of your socks should always be the same color, Or they should at least both be fairly dark
assume asteroid common earth hammer happens hits involving judging laboratory realistic
What happens if a big asteroid hits Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad.
basically choking data device duck equipped global network noise
What, exactly, is the internet? Basically it is a global network exchanging digitized data in such a way that any computer, anywhere, that is equipped with a device called a 'modem', can make a noise like a duck choking on a kazoo
excellent name rock
'Varlet and the Squeaking Codpieces'' would be an excellent name for a rock band.