Famous Quotes & Sayings

Dave Barry

If women were in charge of all the world's nations, there would be sincerely believe this - no military conflicts, and when there WAS a military conflict, everybody involved would feel just awful and there would soon be a high-level exchange of notes written on greeting cards with flowers on the front, followed by a Peace Luncheon

Preston Sturges

wouldn't it be hilarious if he ran his pipes through (fill in the blank)?

Bill Watterson

When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.

Benny Hill

Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born?

Bob Thaves

Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes.

Daniel Handler

Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator.

Ashleigh Brilliant

If you have something to say and say nothing, you are really telling a lie.

Ashleigh Brilliant

Look how often the unexpected happens - yet we still never expect it.

Ashleigh Brilliant

One possible reason that I don't believe in fate is that I wasn't fated to.

Charles Dickens

Virtue shows quite as well in rags and patches as she does in purple and fine linen.

David Sedaris

At the morgue, people were so desensitized that they would eat lunch in the glass walled room adjacent to the autopsy room. A viewing room. Because it had the best air conditioning in the building. So they would eat in there and maybe somebody would come in who had been found after being dead for three days and they would say: That is the exact purple I want for those drapes in the study. They didn't miss a beat. They could eat through anything.

Alan Watts

To put is still more plainly: the desire for security and the feeling of insecurity are the same thing. To hold your breath is to lose your breath. A society based on the quest for security is nothing but a breath-retention contest in which everyone is as taut as a drum and as purple as a beet.

Edmund Spenser

So furiously each other did assayle, As if their soules they would attonce haue rent Out of their brests, that streames of bloud did rayle Adowne, as if their springes of life were spent; That all the ground with purple bloud was sprent, And all their armours staynd with bloudie gore, Yet scarcely once to breath would they relent, So mortall was their malice and so sore, Become of fayned friendship which they vow'd afore.

James Whistler

Mauve is just pink trying to be purple.

Juvenal

The grape gains its purple tinge by looking at another grape. [Lat., Uvaque conspecta livorem ducit ab uva.]

Bill Watterson

I won't eat any cereal that doesn't turn the milk purple.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning

Purple lilies Dante blew To a larger bubble with his prophet breath.

Alexei Navalny

Prime Minister Dmitry Medvedev can no longer attend concerts by his favorite group Deep Purple without having to fear that the musicians will wear T-shirts with Pussy Riot written on them.

Carlos Castaneda

You see all of us go through the same doubts. We are afraid of being mad; unfortunately for us, of course, all of us are already mad.

C. S. Lewis

you had nothing to say about it and yet made the nothing up into words.

Charlotte Bronte

He made me love him without looking at me.

Brandon Boyd

Too bad the things that make you mad are my favorite things.

Dave Barry

At the time, we were mad at Moammar Gadhafi, which resulted in us bombing all over Libya and killing a bunch of people, but not him. Then Ronald Reagan gets up and says we're not trying to kill him, we're just dropping bombs. You can kill all the Libyans you want, but legally you can't try to kill the leader.

Cary Grant

I'd like to have made one of those big splashy Technicolor musicals with Rita Hayworth.

Jane Wagner

The truth can be made up if you know how.

Alan Moore

As far as I can see, it's not important that we have free will, just as long as we have the illusion of free will to stop us going mad.

Alan Moore

On my fortieth birthday, rather than merely bore my friends by having anything as mundane as a midlife crisis I decided it might be more interesting to actually terrify them by going completely mad and declaring myself to be a magician.