Famous Quotes & Sayings

Alan Bennett

Here I sit, alone at 60, Bald and fat and full of sin Cold the seat, and loud the cistern As I read the (Harpic) (Lysol) tin

Chris Brown

My best kiss was on stage. Kelly Rowland from Destiny's Child gave me a really nice soft kiss on my lips during a performance on my birthday. It was amazing.

Chloe Grace Moretz

My mom won't let me buy high-fashion stuff unless it's TK Maxx or a birthday occasion.

David Sedaris

It's odd the things that people remember. Parents will arrange a birthday party, certain it will stick in your mind forever. You'll have a nice time, then two years later you'll be like, 'There was a pony there? Really? And a clown with one leg?'

Dave Barry

The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.

Dave Barry

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

Dave Barry

Today, you're 50. Now we can round your age up to 100! Happy 50th birthday!

Dave Barry

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look like giant thumbs.

Catherine Bell

The main prank that we play with props is for people's birthdays. The special effects people will put a little explosive in the cake so it blows up in their face - that's always fun to play on a guest star, or one of the trainees or someone who's new.

Charles Caleb Colton

The only kind office performed for us by our friends of which we never complain is our funeral; and the only thing which we most want, happens to be the only thing we never purchase--our coffin.

Charles Dickens

... No, the office is one thing, and private life is another. When I go into the office, I leave the Castle behind me, and when I come into the Castle, I leave the office behind me.

Alan Greenspan

Anyone willing to do what is required to become president of the United States is thereby barred from taking that office. I'm only half joking

David Morrissey

My house is very clean apart from a very small part of it that looks as if we've been burgled, which is my office.

David Morrissey

I always have to go out to work even if it's just a desk somewhere or an office or the British Library.

David Greenberg

People should make distinctions between the office of the presidency and the person who occupies it. You can respect the office even as you lose respect for the individual.

Dave Barry

Another important rule of affair-having: Never be discreet at the office.

William Shakespeare

Wolves and bears, they say, casting their savagery aside, have done like offices of pity.

Niki Tsongas

There are wives who are very involved with their husbands' offices and really take their responsibility seriously in terms of issues and things like that. I was never very comfortable with being part of that.

David Crosby

CSNY is a little like putting seven pounds of stuff in a three pound bag.

Dave Barry

'Escargot' is French for 'fat crawling bag of phlegm'.

David Suzuki

Plastic bags are bad and for the most part unnecessary.

Mike Stringer

We're in a hazardous occupation, so safety's our first concern. We're taking sleeping bags and stuff. So if it's hotels, great. It could be tents.

Earl Scruggs

If you don't let things develop, it's like keeping something in a bag and not letting it out to fly

James Loy

We have no choice but to open any bags that raise concern,

Bill Maher

Your fuselage shouldn't open more easily than your pretzel bag.

Bruce Barber

There are people who bring garbage bags full of bread to the lake and just dump it, ... This is part of an overall management plan to essentially reclaim the town from the geese.

Mike Williams

Luckily the bags don't hit back do they? They told me to tie my right hand to my head, I keep dropping my guard.