Famous Quotes & Sayings

Dave Barry

I have a friend named Doris who argues, on good authority, that the single biggest cause of global warming is menopause.

David Talbot

Journalism is not just a cause, its also a wacky profession.

Kevin McCarthy

We are lowering our future revenue estimates modestly, which causes a slight decline in our earnings-per-share assumptions. Our fourth-quarter earnings estimate now is $1.45, down a penny, and our 2001 estimate is $4.90, down from $4.95.

Legal Maxim

Where the law is most strictly administered, it sometimes causes the greatest wrong

David Givens

When you start to see the emotional muscles contracting, you know there's some attraction. The muscles of the face are definitely emotional. The upper trapezius muscle is emotional, which causes you to flex your head and your shoulders.

Aiden Wilson Tozer

Every advance that we make for God and for His cause must be made at our inconvenience. If it does not inconvenience us at all, there is no cross in it.

Bo Burnham

I masturbate 'cause I'm the only one whose standards are low enough to f-k me.

Billy Gibbons

Can't do it, simply cause underneath 'em is too ugly.

David Hume

Nothing exists without a cause, the original cause of this universe we call God.

Aiden Wilson Tozer

Faith is not in itself a meritorious act; the merit is in the One to Whom it is directed.

Chanakya

Offspring, friends and relatives flee from a devotee of the Lord: yet those who follow him bring merit to their families through their devotion.

Charles Maurice de Talleyrand

Merit, however inconsiderable, should be sought for and rewarded. Methods are the master of masters.

Benjamin Franklin

Great Modesty often hides great Merit.

Baltasar Gracian

The more merit, the less affection.

Ben Affleck

I've learned to think, I may succeed or fail, but I'm going to do so on the merit of my own instincts.

Jean Giraudoux

Ask any soldier. To kill a man is to merit a woman.

Ron Barber

On my team, we prioritize merits over politics.

Atharva Veda

May we imbibe all those qualities and sublime merits possessed by gods.

Charles Simmons

When a person feels disposed to over estimate his own importance, let him remember that mankind got along very well before his birth, and that in all probability they will they will get along very well after his death.

Alan Bennett

Here I sit, alone at 60, Bald and fat and full of sin Cold the seat, and loud the cistern As I read the (Harpic) (Lysol) tin

Chris Brown

My best kiss was on stage. Kelly Rowland from Destiny's Child gave me a really nice soft kiss on my lips during a performance on my birthday. It was amazing.

Chloe Grace Moretz

My mom won't let me buy high-fashion stuff unless it's TK Maxx or a birthday occasion.

David Sedaris

It's odd the things that people remember. Parents will arrange a birthday party, certain it will stick in your mind forever. You'll have a nice time, then two years later you'll be like, 'There was a pony there? Really? And a clown with one leg?'

Dave Barry

The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.

Dave Barry

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

Dave Barry

Today, you're 50. Now we can round your age up to 100! Happy 50th birthday!

Dave Barry

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look like giant thumbs.