Famous Quotes & Sayings

Ben Bradlee

You never monkey with the truth.

Bob Dylan

Little red wagon, little red bike, I ain’t no monkey but I know what I like.

Eli Roth

I'll direct any movie starring a monkey or the Olsen Twins. Preferably both.

Albert Einstein

But then, after all, we are all alike, for we are all derived from the monkey.

Alan Garner

When a monkey nibbles on a weenis, it's funny in any language.

Aneurin Bevan

Why should I question the monkey when I can question the organ grinder.

Alvah Bessie

When you're dealing with monkeys, you've got to expect some wrenches.

Dashiell Hammett

My way of learning is to heave a wild and unpredictable monkey-wrench into the machinery.

Eric Schmidt

Twitter can no more produce analysis than a monkey can type out a work of Shakespeare.

Charles Simmons

When a person feels disposed to over estimate his own importance, let him remember that mankind got along very well before his birth, and that in all probability they will they will get along very well after his death.

Alan Bennett

Here I sit, alone at 60, Bald and fat and full of sin Cold the seat, and loud the cistern As I read the (Harpic) (Lysol) tin

Chris Brown

My best kiss was on stage. Kelly Rowland from Destiny's Child gave me a really nice soft kiss on my lips during a performance on my birthday. It was amazing.

Chloe Grace Moretz

My mom won't let me buy high-fashion stuff unless it's TK Maxx or a birthday occasion.

David Sedaris

It's odd the things that people remember. Parents will arrange a birthday party, certain it will stick in your mind forever. You'll have a nice time, then two years later you'll be like, 'There was a pony there? Really? And a clown with one leg?'

Dave Barry

The information encoded in your DNA determines your unique biological characteristics, such as sex, eye color, age and Social Security number.

Dave Barry

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

Dave Barry

Today, you're 50. Now we can round your age up to 100! Happy 50th birthday!

Dave Barry

The simple truth is that balding African-American men look cool when they shave their heads, whereas balding white men look like giant thumbs.