Famous Quotes & Sayings

Dave Barry

If women were in charge of all the world's nations, there would be sincerely believe this - no military conflicts, and when there WAS a military conflict, everybody involved would feel just awful and there would soon be a high-level exchange of notes written on greeting cards with flowers on the front, followed by a Peace Luncheon

Preston Sturges

wouldn't it be hilarious if he ran his pipes through (fill in the blank)?

Bill Watterson

When life gives you lemons, chunk it right back.

Benny Hill

Have you noticed that all the people in favor of birth control are already born?

Bob Thaves

Inside me there's a thin person struggling to get out, but I can usually sedate him with four or five cupcakes.

Daniel Handler

Everyone should be able to do one card trick, tell two jokes, and recite three poems, in case they are ever trapped in an elevator.

Ashleigh Brilliant

If you have something to say and say nothing, you are really telling a lie.

Ashleigh Brilliant

Look how often the unexpected happens - yet we still never expect it.

Ashleigh Brilliant

One possible reason that I don't believe in fate is that I wasn't fated to.

Henry Miller

I'm a bit retarded, like most Americans.

Jason Alexander

I'm still bald, I just wear a toupee.

Eckhart Tolle

You are never more essentially, more deeply, yourself than when you are still.

Brian J. White

I was a surrogate for Obama; I helped fundraise. I'm still a supporter.

Bob Hope

I can still chase women, only downhill

Eamon

When John (Giles) was manager of Ireland, much as he loved me, he still dropped me.

Brigitte Bardot

I am 30, but there are things about me that are still 15.

Antonio Davis

I'm still doing something I love to do.

Rachel Cohn

Do you still Kill Gerbils?

David Bowie

You can't stand still on one point for your entire life.