Famous Quotes & Sayings

Charles Dickens

Make them laugh, make them cry, make them wait.

Charles Spurgeon

My soul, never laugh at sin's fooleries, lest thou come to smile at sin itself. It is thine enemy, and thy Lord's enemy.

Alan Bradley

I was learning that among friends, a smile can be better than a belly laugh.

Alan Alda

Nothing important was ever accomplished without chutzpah. Columbus had chutzpah. The signers of the Declaration of Independence had chutzpah. Don't ever aim doubt at yourself. Laugh at yourself, but don't doubt yourself.

Chita Rivera

I love to laugh, I love the joy of life, and I love sharing it.

Dave Chappelle

I just always loved stand-up. It's like magic. You say something, and a whole room full of people laughs together. Say something else, they laugh again. The fact that people come to see that and participate in that... I don't know, it's just like magic.

David Sedaris

When you read comic material and people aren't laughing how do you know they're listening.

David Sedaris

To say that a humorist exaggerates to get big laughs, I don't see how that's big news.

Buddy Ebsen

The one flaw in this is that you can't hear the people laughing.

Charles Caleb Colton

Fame is an undertaker that pays but little attention to the living, but bedizens the dead, furnishes out their funerals, and follows them to the grave

William Shakespeare

Thrift, thrift, Horatio! The funeral bak'd meats did coldly furnish forth the marriage tables.

Charles Bradlaugh

[That] my body be buried as cheaply as possible and no speeches be permitted at my funeral.

Marilyn Miller

We want to make sure they can't do this at the funeral of a hero.

Charles Bukowski

You are thirty minutes late." "Yes." "Would you be thirty minutes late to a wedding or a funeral?" "No." "Why not, pray tell?" "Well, if the funeral was mine I'd have to be on time. If the wedding was mine it would be my funeral.

Eugene Kennedy

The priesthood is not dying, but the clerical state is dead. It needs to be buried, preferably with a Viking funeral in Boston Harbor so nobody can miss the spectacle of its passing.

Alexander the Great

I foresee a great funeral contest over me.

Amy Poehler

We may all host ourselves to death, and if we're all dead who will host our funerals?

Dwight L. Moody

I hunted all through the four Gospels trying to find one of Christ's funeral sermons, but I couldn't find any. I found He broke up every funeral He ever attended! Death couldn't exist where He was.

Dave Chappelle

I would go to work on the show and I felt awful every day, that's not the way it was. ... I felt like some kind of prostitute or something. If I feel so bad, why keep on showing up to this place? I'm going to Africa. The hardest thing to do is to be true to yourself, especially when everybody is watching.

John McFarland

We started playing on Marty's kid's stuff. God, it was an awful noise!

Stephen Friedman

We're in a society where an awful lot of the institutions we have were built for a different era, an era where we had 16 workers for every retiree.

Mayor Madison

We're talking about an awful lot of money here to get the mansion in shape. It is up to you to decide what you want to do.

Helen George

I love having my cards read - if you go to a proper place, they wouldn't dream of telling you anything awful that is going to happen.

Louis C. K.

It's just a big excuse to say awful things.

Hugh Fountain

We were awful in the second quarter. We didn't start that bad. We'd execute for a few plays, but we couldn't keep things going. We challenged them at halftime.

John Calipari

We were awful for a while. In that first half, oh my gosh. I'm looking at it, thinking, 'Can we be this bad?' Yeah. And it was a little bit of being gun-shy from that loss. That happens when you lose.

Mark McGrath

We were always open to all sides and experimented an awful lot. That way we had a lot of mellow songs and a lot of noisy, loud songs.