Related Quotes
funny humorous mind
I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it. Charles Dickens
funny morning self
All knives and forks were working away at a rate that was quite alarming; very few words were spoken; and everybody seemed to eat his utmost, in self defence, as if a famine were expected to set in before breakfast-time to-morrow morning, and it had become high time to assert the first law of nature.
funny death witty
He would make a lovely corpse.
funny kings humorous
It is an old prerogative of kings to govern everything but their passions.
funny people literature
Although a skillful flatterer is a most delightful companion if you have him all to yourself, his taste becomes very doubtful when he takes to complimenting other people.
funny christmas xmas
Happy, happy Christmas, that can win us back to the delusions of our childhood days, recall to the old man the pleasures of his youth, and transport the traveler back to his own fireside and quiet home!
funny law people
If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers.
funeral littles pay
Fame is an undertaker that pays but little attention to the living, but bedizens the dead, furnishes out their funerals, and follows them to the grave Charles Caleb Colton
funny marriage wedding
Marriage is a feast where the grace is sometimes better than the dinner.
golf wanted realised
I always wanted to be a golfer, only I realised that if I'd played golf I would have been skint. Alan Hansen
golf swings perfect
Is there such a thing as a technically perfect swing? If there is, I have yet to see it. David Leadbetter
golf swings goal
Your final goal is to convert your athletic swing to pure instinct rather than conscious thought.
golf looks terrible
I like golf because you can be really terrible at it, and still not look much dorkier than anybody else. Dave Barry
golf balls want
You can, legally, possibly hit and kill a fellow golfer with a ball, and there will not be a lot of trouble because the other golfers will refuse to stop and be witnesses because they will want to keep playing.
golf self expression
If you explain so clearly that nobody can misunderstand, somebody will. If you're right 90% of the time, why quibble about the remaining 3%? In Africa some of the native tribes have a custom of beating the ground with clubs and uttering spine chilling cries. Anthropologists call this a form of primitive self-expression. In America we call it golf.
golf hitting balls
For me, the worst part of playing golf, by far, has always been hitting the ball.
golf talking interesting
Talking about golf is always boring. Playing golf can be interesting, but not the part where you try to hit the little ball; only the part where you drive the cart.
golf balls swamps
Once when I was golfing in Georgia, I hooked the ball into the swamp. I went in after it and found an alligator wearing a shirt with a picture of a little golfer on it. Buddy Hackett
men
Poetry's unnat'ral; no man ever talked poetry 'cept a beadle on boxin' day.
men hair doors
An observer of men who finds himself steadily repelled by some apparently trifling thing in a stranger is right to give it great weight. It may be the clue to the whole mystery. A hair or two will show where a lion is hidden. A very little key will open a very heavy door.
men brotherhood common
The more man knows of man, the better for the common brotherhood among men.
men fellow-man spirit
It is required of every man," the ghost returned, "that the spirit within him should walk abroad among his fellow-men, and travel far and wide; and, if that spirit goes not forth in life, it is condemned to do so after death.
men laughing people
When a man bleeds inwardly, it is a dangerous thing for himself; but when he laughs inwardly, it bodes no good to other people.
men judging world
Most men unconsciously judge the world from themselves, and it will be very generally found that those who sneer habitually at human nature, and affect to despise it, are among its worst and least pleasant samples.
men coats shabby
It is not every man that can afford to wear a shabby coat.
men talking two
When we are in the company of sensible men, we ought to be doubly cautious of talking too much, lest we lose two good things, their good opinion and our own improvement; for what we have to say we know, but what they have to say we know not.
men years two
No man can promise himself even fifty years of life, but any man may, if he please, live in the proportion of fifty years in forty-let him rise early, that he may have the day before him, and let him make the most of the day, by determining to expend it on two sorts of acquaintance only-those by whom something may be got, and those from whom something maybe learned.